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THE STONEHOUSE DICTIONARY
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The following is a glossary of terms and definitions provided to aid you in the engagement of verbal discourse with the average STONEHOUSE patron. It is by no means considered a "complete works" as the language of "Stonhousease" is a constantly developing dialect. This page will be added to as the language develops. Please pick on the E-mail link at the bottom of the page to add your own STONEHOUSE-ISM.

* Aeropalmics (ayr o palm' iks) - n. The study of wind resistance conducted by holding a cupped hand out to the side of a speeding motorcycle.

* Animalanche (a nim al anche) - adj. When one extremely drunken biker falls off a bar stool and in the process knocks down several other extremely drunken bikers.

* Backspackle (bak' spak uhl) - n. Markings on the back of one's shirt from riding a fenderless chopper in the rain.

* Bovilexia (bo vil eks' e uh) - n. The uncontrollable urge to lean out over the side of the bike and yell "Moo!" every time you pass a cow.

* Brattled (brat' uld) - adj. The unsettling feeling, at a stoplight, that the busload of kids that just pulled up beside you is making fun of you.

* Cheedle (chee' dul) - n. The residue left on one's fingertips after consuming a bag of Cheetos.

* Chipfault (chip' fawlt) - n. The stress point on a potato chip where it breaks off and stays behind in the dip.

* Cinemuck - n. The combination of popcorn, soda, and melted chocolate which covers the floors of movie theaters.

* Cycleocreakia (cyc leo crek ia) - adj. A term used to describe those crackling, tinkling, creaking noises your bike makes when you park it and turn it off.

* Das Earsplitten Loudenboomer
(derivitive - old German slang)
An extremly painful and chronic malady of the inner ear. A temporary condition caused either by sitting too close to the band's sound equipment or by engaging in a lengthy conversation with Rodney.

* Farfrompuken
(derived from - new age phsudoe German technoism)
A term used to describe the feeling one gets when enjoying an evening out at the Stonehouse and consuming mass quantities of refreshingly cold adult beverages. It is an often heard phrase uttered by many a patron just before embarrassing themselves in public. (Example: No way dude, I'm cool. I'm farfrompuken! Opps!)

* Fenderbergs - n. The large glacial deposits that form on the insides of car fenders during snowstorms.

* Fictate (fik' tayt) - v. To labor under the dilusion that you must inform a television or screen character of impending danger under the assumption they can hear you.

* Flintsteps (flint' steps) - v. To wind up one's feet before running away in fear. Common among cartoon characters.

* Flopcorn (flop' korn) - n. The unpopped kernels at the bottom of the cooker.

* Flotion (flo' shun) - n. The tendency when sharing a waterbed to undulate for five minutes every time the other person moves.

* Gazinta (gah zin' tuh) - n. Mathematical symbol for division; also the sound uttered when dividing out loud. (Example: "Four gazinta eight twice.")

* Hozone (ho' zohn) - n. The place where one sock in every laundry load disappears to.

* Jukejitters (jook' jit erz) - n. Fear that everyone thinks that you picked the awful tune emanating from the jukebox when it was actually the person before you.

* Krogeling (kroh' gel ing) - n. The nibbling of small items of fruit and produce at the supermarket, which the customer considers "free sampling" and the owner considers "shoplifting".

* PEBSAB - (achronym) Problem Exists Between Stool and Bar

* Peppier (pehp ee ay') n. The waiter at a fancy restaurant whose
   sole purpose seems to be walking around asking diners if they want
   ground pepper.

* Phonesia (fo nee' zhuh) n. The affliction of dialing a phone
   number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.

* Presidue n. - The term used to describe the spot left on Monica Lewinski's dress after her visit to the oval office.

* P-spot (pee' spaht) - n. The area directly above the urinal in public restrooms that men stare at, knowing a glance in any other direction would arouse suspicion.

* Reintarnation - The beliefe that you will come back to life as a hillbilly.

* Snackmosphere - adj. The 95% air inside bags of potato chips.

* Telecrastination (tel e kras tin ay' shun) n. The act of always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you're only six inches away

Do you know of a STONEHOUSISM, a phrase or term which should appear here? Pick here to send it to us and we will be happy to add it to our page.